I’m a Sisterhood of Motherhood Partner and am a sponsored blog partner, but all opinions are my own. Please see below for additional disclosure.
My son’s first trip to a corn maze is something I’ll never forget. As we tromped through the maze, he became overheated so I had to strip him down to his diaper to let him cool off. As we wandered around in search of the maze exit, I overheard another Mom exclaim in a staged whisper, “Where are that baby’s clothes?” It wasn’t the question that bothered me. It was the tone that it was said in. The tone of her voice relayed clearly what she thought of my parenting decision. Unable to see my face, she had no idea the tears that flowed. Without knowing me or my son, she had no way of knowing that despite it being October, he needed to be undressed. Without knowing us, or our situation, she felt comfortable judging us.
I wish that were the only instance in which I felt judged as a brand new Mom, but it wasn’t. I heard the whispered questions, that sounded much like accusations, about the sores on his head, hands, and feet. I heard the troubled exclamations about his near constant state of undress. Without knowing us, or our needs, others felt comfortable judging us.
I saw the disgusted looks some Mom’s gave me when I pulled out the bottle and the formula to feed him. Of course, they had no way of knowing that because of the skin disorder I am affected by, I literally am incapable of lactating. Or that I spent the first two weeks of his life desperately pumping every two hours, alternated with him latching ever two hours, to have less than an ounce of breastmilk in a bag after 24 HOURS and how I cried when I dropped that bag of milk and it dribbled into a tiny puddle on the floor! Or that his pediatrician begged me to bottle feed him and told me if I persisted with breast feeding he would need a total blood transfusion because he was jaundiced and his liver wasn’t getting enough to flush the bilirubin from his system and his skin wouldn’t allow him to be placed under the bili-lamps. Without knowing that I counted my inability to feed my son naturally as my single biggest failure, other Mom’s judged me.
And I didn’t like it. One bit.
That’s why I agreed to be a Sisterhood of Motherhood Partner. I think it’s high time we end mommy wars!
I can say as a Mom, feeling the judgement of other Mom’s who had no clue has been very hurtful. Similac has released another Sisterhood of Motherhood video that will make you think. The Mom’s confessed how they judged each other based on their perceptions and personal choices. It will make you pause before judging another Mom. It may even compel you to learn her story. I hope it compels you to encourage the Mom’s you know.
Let’s support one another as we tackle one of the most important, yet challenging, jobs on earth… parenting!
Similac partnered with bloggers such as me for its Sisterhood of Motherhood Program. As part of this program, I received compensation for my time. Similac believes that consumers and bloggers are free to form their own opinions and share them in their own words. Similac’s policies align with WOMMA Ethics Code, Federal Trade Commission (FTC) guidelines and social media engagement recommendations.